I was talking to a guy yesterday…at the beach…as they say here in Ecuador. When I asked him about Loving Himself, he got a quizzical look on his face, like that’s a different view. Then it turned to, “Nope I don’t believe that,” kinda look. He began talking about how we all should serve others. He is internet marketing savvy, so he spoke about what is my niche, who is my customer …blah…blah…blah. The same blather you hear all over the internet these days.
It seemed like he was deflecting, so not having to deal with what was going on inside. Like, did HE Love Himself? Can’t go there!
Gotta Love other people. That’s how business and the world works. Ya right…That’s working out real well.
I said maybe we need a new way to look at things. The saying “Love you neighbor as yourself” means that you can only “serve” the world as much as you love yourself.
Then he gave a little and admitted that there is a balance there.
I think he asked once about how can we do “that,” like it’s snake oil or some conspiracy theory, but we never went there.
Do you relate? Can you think about Loving Yourself?
I can’t really blame him. His reaction is the typical response. All outward focused.
But if you read the stories of all the big Internet players out there, they all had that moment of, “I am not fulfilled.” Many lost their business and had to start again. Some never could make their business work until they found what they Loved to Do!
It’s deeper than that though. It’s not “to do,” it’s “to be!”
Loving Yourself is a process of learning who you are, intrinsically. That You have basic qualities which make you worthy of Finding Your Dream!
Oprah Winfrey said that her success and peace of mind came when she realized the she was worthy. That was the pivot point for her.
The top internet business people repeat things like I am Worthy of Success…my Dreams…of being Loved. They realize that they can do it, that it is their Destiny. Their intentions change. Their “vibration” rises to a level where good things can happen.
Then, when they focus on other people, their story resonates, and their message is compelling.
They also realize that their only responsibility is to themselves. Did you know that only about 10% of the people taking courses online ever finish them, and even fewer actually apply them successfully!!! So serving others is a very dangerous path to walk down. You put yourself out there and do your best and 2 or 3 out of 100 buy your service or course, and then only 10% of the 2 or 3 actually benefit from all your hard work.
That has depression written all over it…if you focus on that, or them. But if you are concerned with doing the best you can…being the best you can be…taking responsibility for yourself, then the outside world can do what it wants.
And you just keep Loving Yourself..and growing, and Finding Your Dream!
The next thing I learned about Loving Yourself was to become accountable.
Stop lying to yourself!
Keep Your Word…no matter what!
See why nobody wants to go there! We can’t deal with our own lies, guilt, and shame. To do so, would mean periods of introspection and evaluation.
Then it means forgiveness…forgiving and asking for forgiveness. Is that hard…not if you know what that brings…Peace
Introspection
How many times have heard about the “gurus” saying at the beginning of the year, they take time to review the past year and think about what they want to accomplish next year? They break it down into quarters, months, weeks, days, and some even hours.
That’s how valuable their time is. That’s how valuable their Dream is!!!
They become accountable to themselves, and then, to others. Those others begin to trust them and become very loyal clients and customers.
Mark Ford tells his story of he set out to get rich. He was lucky enough to find a mentor and a coach, and when he did become successful, he retired and started doing things that he loved to do, like writing. He wrote 10 books, thousands of articles, and movie screenplays and retired again. He’s having fun and is very focused!
So this Path…this Journey of Finding your Dream is inward-focused…not outward.
If you really want to discover what you want and how to get it, contact me here!
Vince
4 Comments
It was a quizzical look. I was puzzled because you gave me no basis for your premise. Just kept on repeating you have to “Love Yourself” over and over with no explanation. Every time I would try to get into your train of thought so I could better understand, your response was something along the lines of: it so hard to grasp I would have to receive coaching from you to understand – which you made blatantly clear was something not everyone can afford. I was just trying to make conversation, you’re the one who asked for advice. And we can go there any time. I love myself, my family, my friends, everyone around me… I’m living the dream. There are ups and downs, but all is good. Like I said there are no rewards without sacrifice. Truly living the best life I can. No regrets 🙂 I recommend you write a post just explaining exactly what you mean with Love Yourself and pin it, so anyone who lands on your website has a clear picture of what the blog is about. People are looking for answers not questions. However, consider creating a podcast instead of a blog. I believe you convey your thoughts better talking than writing. Plus, a lot of people nowadays rather listen while driving than read on their computers – specially about topics like the ones you’re writing about.
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Thank you for your gratitude. I will offer it up to the Universe for the betterment of All!
Blessings
Vince
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